Question: Bhai kitni door?

Answer: Bas Bhai “EK Minute” me aaya.

This is what India is. A place where distance is measured not in kms but in minutes. We Indians are best at inventing conventional things that just suit our requirements aptly; hence we have invented our own units for time, redefining the standard systems. In this list is added “One Minute” and these 60seconds are so important for us that we believe we can cover up an 1 hour job in that single minute. Every Indian faces these “One Minute” dilemma’s  that make him a “Survivor”..

Let us see how..

  1. Morning Wala “Last One Minute”-Part 1

Who doesn’t like to sleep? Who wants to miss even a single minute of enjoying the cosyness of our quilt? Who wants to get out of the bed?

No one. Our morning saga begins with alarms and we befool ourselves by saying, “Last one minute, then I’d wake up”.

And when that “last minute” ends when you realize you are already late for your office/school. This is the time when you say, “Had I woke up that time’ I would not have gotten late.”

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  1. Morning wala “Last One Minute”- Part 2

You already are late. You leave your so lovable, so cosy bed, and rush towards your restroom. And the only thing you would not want to happen is the restroom being locked from inside. That is when you realize your brother/sister/roomie is already emptying his/her stomach inside and you shout trying to break into the door, “How much more time yaar?” and you get a reply in a very relaxed voice, “Just A Minute”, As if they were waiting inside for you to call them out.

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  1. Lecture wala “Last One Minute.”

At the very start of the day, that one last minute has gotten you late twice. Now in the lectures, you look at your boring watch and you realize it is the best time to grab some more “one minute” nap to refresh yourself. Inside of you, you want it to happen the same as it happened in the morning, that one minute turns to passage of 15 minutes. And while you are realizing all this, you fall asleep. When you wake up with a loud shout of your lecturer you realize that only 47 seconds have passed while you fell asleep. Oops!!
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  1. Teacher wala “Last One Minute”

While you are still wondering about what happened with you in those 47 seconds, you realize the lecture is about to end. The clock says Times Up, and the very same moment the teacher proudly announces “Last One minute Kids, let me wind up the topic.” as if it is his birthright to add 10 minutes to the allotted time for his lecture. This “last one minute” of your teacher never ends before 15 minutes. That ain’t fair, is it?
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  1. Examination wala “Last One Minute”

This is the kind of minute we have been begging for our entire student life. “Last one minute” before the snatching of your answer sheet by the invigilator matters more than those 3 long hours we spend staring at the walls and remembering the songs heard last night. We feel that this one minute is our birthright and we tend to feel very offended if the invigilator denies this most important “Last One Minute”. Who the hell made him so hard faced to not allow us to write for just a minute more? That is so not fair.
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  1. Mom wala “Last one minute”

This minute is much more dangerous than any other. You get free from all your tuitions. This last minute is needed when you are sharing the back seat of your activa with a beautiful female “friend” of yours to drop her home after the tution and suddenly your phone rings, you drag the phone out of the pocket and exclaim “Phew, it is mom again”. You pick up the phone, mom asks “Beta,kaha ho?” and the only thing your reply is…….

“Mummy, aa gaya,“Ek Minute” bas”.

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DISCLAIMER: CALL THE COPS ON ME IF ANY OF THE ABOVE IS FALSE.